Lazy days are the best. Lying around, nothing on the calendar. TV off! The kids complain for a little while, but then find something to do, and it’s almost always something terrifically cooperative and mom-smile inducing. Playing school with the American Girl dolls, building a fort, creating magnificent works of art. Lately, it’s been Yahtzee, which is great, except the kids are mad that I won’t let them use a calculator to total their scores. Call it summer school.
The game of choice used to be Monopoly, but it takes forever and Zuzu always wins. We have no idea how she wins, but she does. Every time. She also manages to go through a phase each game where she is very, very poor and winds up in jail a lot. She is extremely sensitive to being teased at this point. Calling her, say, a jailbird, will bring a flood of tears. I know this because somehow, I manage to do this every time we play. Bad, bad Mama. Did I mention how happy I am that we have moved on to playing Yahtzee?
But the truth is, the lazy days can only last so long before the crazy comes. I’m not sure if this in endemic to all moms, or just something coded deeply in my DNA. After day or three of lazy, I start to see all the things that have been left undone. The piles of laundry, both clean and dirty. The layer of dust coating everything. Whatever you do, don’t look at your socks after walking around the house-eew. By all means, ignore that accumulation of dog hair in the corner of that stair. And that one. If you close the toilet lid quickly, you won’t notice the ring lurking in the bowl, I promise.
And so, one morning when the family has been lulled into a sense of ease at the flow of lazy days, the crazy mom wakes up. Everything must be done, and right now. She has the energy of someone mainlining Red Bull, and she hasn’t even had her coffee yet. Children are bounced out of bed with the “clean your room” battle cry. Don’t try to take a hot shower, because the dishwasher and the washing machine are both running. The dogs are cowering outside, because they really hate the vacuum, and the vacuum’s working overtime. Don’t stand still for too long-if she catches you, she’ll give you a new job. These are the days you really wish there was something on the calendar.
Hopefully, the crazy is over as quickly as it began. Really, I can only sustain it for a few hours-a whole day, tops. There will be some line in the sand; some mysterious point at which the magic “enough” has been done. Suddenly, most everything is peaceful again. The house is tidier. It still looks like a family lives here, just a less sloppy family. Take a deep breath and make a pot of coffee. It will be ready right after that hot shower. Anyone for a game of Yahtzee?
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